Cityfile: New York's Most Notable and Influential

• A judge has granted a temporary restraining order barring Jennifer Lopez's ex, Ojani Noa, from distributing a sex tape starring his former wife/benefactor. The order is only in effect for a day and another hearing is scheduled for today, so J. Lo's sex-filled 1997 honeymoon may still see the light of day yet. [TMZ, Reuters]
• Malaysian party boy (and clubland savior) Jho Low celebrated his 28th birthday last week at Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas with "bikini-clad party girls and surrounded by caged lions and tigers." Later, he partied with Paris Hilton, Usher, and Jamie Foxx, who reportedly "gifted the birthday boy" with a red sports car for some reason. Apparently, Low is often mistaken for photographer Chance Yeh, so make sure you don't get these two mixed up. A tip: Low is one buying 120 bottles of Cristal. [P6]
• Robert "Joe" Halderman, the guy accused of trying to extort David Letterman, appears in court today and his lawyer is expected to ask the judge to dismiss some of the charges against him. How long he'll be able to afford a lawyer is unclear. He's raised $100,000 for his legal defense fund, but he was also suspended without pay by CBS recently, too. [NYP, MSNBC]
• Madonna wants to clear a few things up: Yes, she's going to Brazil, but no, it's not to meet Jesus Luz's mom. She's going "strictly for fundraising and humanitarian purposes," thank you very much. [P6]More

There's a new playa on the club scene, have you heard? When he recently blazed past the velvet rope at Avenue, one naive young partygoer wondered aloud, "Is it P. Diddy?" No, it wasn't Diddy. It was someone even better! It was Taek Jho Low, the man making it rain at clubs all over town! Sure, he may not look like a baller—he's a doughy, bespectacled, 20-something Malaysian and Wharton graduate—but don't be fooled. Jho Low is taking bottle service to an entirely new level, and bankers who drop a mere $5,000 per night could do well to take some lessons from this guy.More

• Are Beyoncé and Jay-Z making plans to have a baby? Perhaps. In a recent interview, Jay "let it slip that procreating is high on the duo's priority list right now." [NYDN]
• Madonna seems to be taking the next step with boyfriend Jesus Luz. She's reportedly jetting to Brazil to meet Luz's parents, including his mom who happens to be fifteen years younger than Madonna. This shouldn't be awkward at all! [Sun]
• Michael Lohan hasn't been sharing his daughter's dramatic phone calls with the world out of the goodness of his heart. He apparently first tried to sell them to various TV networks for $100,000, but ended up striking a deal with Radar, which has Gosselin giving them up for free but getting paid for an interview. Meanwhile, the latest Lohan phone call has been released. [P6, Radar] More

Spotted | John Mayer getting his hair cut at Sally Hershberger's salon in the meatpacking district ... Celine Dion getting into an SUV ... Chris Noth walking to the set of Sex and the City 2 ... Michael Douglas working out on a treadmill at the Equinox on 77th Street ... Naomi Watts walking to her apartment building in NoHo ... Ivanka Trump signing autographs after an appearance on Regis & Kelly ... Alessandra Ambrosio shopping with her daughter in the West Village ... Taylor Momsen talking on her cell phone while standing on the Gossip Girl set ... Hugh Jackman and wife Deborah Lee walking in SoHo ... Ed Westwick and Jessica Szohr arriving at Ed's apartment ... Tim McGraw getting out of an SUV ... Edie Falco shooting scenes for Nurse Jackie ... Usher walking outside ... Penelope Cruz leaving her hotel en route to JFK ... and Rihanna heading into a recording studio downtown.

Happy Birthday | It's a big day for Jewish fashion designers from the outer boroughs, clearly: Brooklyn native Isaac Mizrahi turns 48 today; meanwhile, the Bronx's very own Ralph Lauren is turning 70. Others celebrating today: Usher is turning 31. Yankees manager Joe Girardi turns 45. Actor Roger Moore is 82. Marc Jacobs' longtime business partner, Robert Duffy, is turning 55. Natalie Maines of the Dixie Chicks is 35. Czech model Daniela Pestova is 39. Sports radio host Jim Rome is turning 45. Writer Katha Pollitt turns 60. Wrestler/actress Stacy Keibler is 30. And Madonna's daughter, Lourdes Leon, who looks like she's turning 21, is actually turning 13 today.

• Jeremy Piven, now fully recovered from his bout with mercury poisoning, has been squiring lots of women around town in recent days. He was out with "a super-pretty African American girl" last Friday; a day later, he was at the Rangers season opener with "a gorgeous blond." Let this be another reminder, however, that short, balding guys can date whoever they want as long as they're on a hit TV show. [P6]
• Producers for Tinsley Mortimer's reality show are reportedly having a hard time getting her friends to sign on. Peter Davis, the Tinz's half-brother-in-law, wrote on Facebook that he has "zero interest in playing a warped, twisted version of myself on television." And socialites Zani Gugelmann and Dani Stahl have also passed. So far the only person confirmed is her sister, Dabney Mercer. So does that mean her ex, Topper Mortimer, is out, too? [P6]
• Padma Lakshmi has said she'd like to keep her pregnancy a private matter. And judging by pictures of her at various parties this week, she's barely showing. But none of that stopped her from telling a reporter that she needs to keep her belly "really lubricated" these days: "Every morning, there's a buttering ceremony after I get out of the shower," she said. "It's really like basting a turkey with body butter." [People]
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• Mariah Carey, Stevie Wonder, Usher, Lionel Richie, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Hudson, John Mayer, and a truck full of elephants (left) will all on hand for the Michael Jackson's memorial service in LA later today. Debbie Rowe and Elizabeth Taylor will not be there, however. [Reuters, NYDN, People, Us]
• Several ladies from the Real Housewives of New York are demanding more cash before signing up for another season of the show. In addition to "six-figure deals," they're asking for clothing, hair and makeup allowances and "a promised amount of screen time." You're shocked by this, we're sure. [NYDN]
• In other Housewives news, it looks like LuAnn de Lesseps may be reuniting with her estranged husband, and Bethenny Frankel is engaged. [P6, Us] More

• The father of Mercy James, the girl being adopted by Madonna, says he has no plans to object to the adoption, and a nanny and nurse have already touched down in Malawi to take care of her. So it looks like the little girl will be climbing aboard Madonna's jet to head to NYC any day now. [Reuters, DM, Sun]
• David Carradine's funeral took place in LA on Saturday and more than 400 mourners turned up for the occasion, including Lucy Liu, Michael Madsen, Jane Seymour, Tom Selleck, Daryl Hannah, Lucy Liu, Edward James Olmos, and Rob Schneider. [Us, AP, People]
• Jeff Goldblum, who is 56, and his new girlfriend, 21-year-old Lost actress Tania Raymonde, "can't keep their hands to themselves," which may explain why they've been seen "making out all over town." [AMNY]

• Paris Hilton reportedly broke up with boyfriend Doug Reinhardt after she saw him partying with a "Texas beauty queen" named Kendhal Beal. The heiress responded by throwing a fit (and some fruit and ice in Beal's direction). But don't you worry about Paris. She's got her dependable sister by her side. And she's already moved on to someone new, namely soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo. [P6, People]
• Madonna will be performing her Kabbalah rituals today with an extra bit of enthusiasm: Malawi's highest court has overturned its previous ruling and has granted her adoption of Mercy James. Justice to the people! [DM]
• Dr. Drew Pinsky of Celebrity Rehab is offering Lindsay Lohan six figures to appear on his VH1 reality show. But only because he cares deeply about her well-being, not because he's interested in ratings or anything. [NYP] More

• There was no shortage of drama at the Grammys last night. Chris Brown and Rihanna were both no-shows after Brown was arrested for allegedly assaulting the R&B singer. Usher failed to appear, too, flying down to Brazil to be with his wife, who suffered complications from a plastic surgery operation. One person who did make it to the show was M.I.A., who performed on stage with Jay-Z, Lil Wayne, T.I., and Kanye West despite being nine months pregnant. [NYP, People, EW]
• Courtenay Semel says she's been cut off by her dad, former Yahoo CEO Terry Semel, and is now trying to land a reality show to pay the bills. [NYP]
• Salman Rushdie's new girlfriend is Pia Glenn, who's 29 years his junior. [R&M]
• Peaches Geldof and rocker Max Drummey are said to be divorcing after just six months of marriage. [The Sun]More

• Martha Stewart is so distraught over the death of her chow chow and her break-up with Charles Simonyi that she's been adopting cats left and right (and throwing them parties, too). Or at least that's what the National Enquirer says. [NE]
• Brooke Shields says the Lipstick Jungle stage manager who stole props from the set swiped cash from her wallet, too. [NYDN]
• Amy Winehouse's house in London was robbed yesterday. [People, The Sun]
• Kimora Lee Simmons and Russell Simmons have finalized their divorce. Good thing, too, since she's pregnant with Djimon Hounsou's baby. [Us]
• Kanye West employs a resident "shoekeeper" to keep track of his 450 pairs of shoes, which is what you'd do, too, if you were Kanye West. [The Sun]More

• Tommy Hilfiger and Dee Ocleppo may have cancelled their first wedding at the last minute back in August, but it looks like the second time is the charm: The couple is reportedly getting hitched later today in a "top-secret, ultra-private" ceremony at his house in Greenwich. [NYP]
• Kanye West is supposedly thinking of moving to London next year to pursue his fashion career. [Mirror]
• Graydon Carter says he personally handles seating arrangements at the Waverly Inn. Oh, and his "three buzz words" for 2009 are "sophisticated, innovative and entitlement." [P6]
• Tragic news: Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony just spent their first weekend apart since the birth of their twins. [Us]More

♦  Madonna's neighbors in her Central Park West building aren't happy that she has turned her seventh-floor apartment into a music studio. (It was originally supposed to be an office for Guy Ritchie.) Now she stays up all night blaring music and practicing for her shows. [NYDN]
♦  Alex Rodriguez is thinking of following Madonna on tour next month when she plans to make stops in Brazil, Chile, and Argentina. [R&M]
♦  Is Jennifer Aniston secretly leaking pregnancy and marriage rumors about herself to the tabloids as a way to steal attention away from Brangelina? [MSNBC]
♦  Friends of Padma Lakshmi want everyone to know she is not a gold digger. She's a "hard-working, self-made woman" who just happens to only date extremely wealthy, older men. [P6]
♦  Peaches Geldof and Max Drummey's 97-day-old marriage may already be on the rocks. [The Sun]More

♦  Guy Ritchie supposedly cried after seeing son Rocco wearing a Yankees t-shirt this week. So sensitive! Or maybe not so much: Ritchie also reportedly described Madonna as "old, fat, ugly and wrinkled," and said she couldn't sing. [Us, NYDN]
♦  Not only did Lindsay Lohan's stint on Ugly Betty get cut short because she didn't get along with America Ferrera, LiLo clashed with everyone else on set, too. Also, she enjoys snipping out photos of herself from the tabloids. [P6]
♦  Jennifer Aniston's publicist is denying she's pregnant. [ET]
♦  Gossip Girl's Taylor Momsen spent four days in the hospital with a "potentially life-threatening throat-infection." But she was miraculously cured and released yesterday afternoon. [Us] 
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Happy Birthday | It's a special day for two important men in the fashion biz: Ralph Lauren is 69 and Isaac Mizrahi is 47. Also celebrating today: Yankees manager Joe Girardi is 44. Marc Jacobs' longtime business partner Robert Duffy is turning 54. Feminist writer Katha Pollitt is 59. Dixie Chicks singer Natalie Maines turns 34. Usher is 30. Model Daniela Pestova turns 38. Wrestler/actress Stacy Keibler is 29. And Madonna's daughter, Lourdes Leon, is turning 12.